For a long time people had told me that I should do an ELI. Before I was even in high school, people were telling me how an ELI would be a great experience for me. It was how they kept harping on how hard it was that threw me off. How was it that these people could so cheerfully talk about how much time was spent desperately combing sources and writings, trying to get something coherent to say on stage. How could they so jovially inform me of the trials, tribulations, breakdowns, and all nighters. Clearly these people were crazy and I, as a stable and sane person, should distance myself from them with utmost expedience. Naturally, I proceeded to go and ask Ms.Wissner if there were any ELI classes open for junior year.
I thought long and hard about what my topic would be. The most interesting presentations that I had seen had been on topics like the morals of immortality and game theory in society. Clearly I had to pick a topic that was on par with these lofty goals. My first thought was emotions and their evolutionary importance. How did feelings like happiness and fear factor into the larger picture of life on earth. Then I thought, no. What about the growing field of transhumanism and how cybernetics and biological manipulation and enhancement would affect social structures. Ooh, no wait, what about…
Summer oozed by and eventually I found myself at the end of it facing another school year. This was about the time I realized I had no idea what classes I had. Presumably, some time last year Char had come to our class and given us a sheet that listed our options, and we dutifully filled out the classes we assumed we would want next year. But hell if I remembered what those were. I didn’t remember that school started in two days until two days before school started, let alone my choices on a sheet I had filled out more than half a year ago.
This is as good a time as any to give you a little insight into my psyche. Buckle your seatbelts, kids. Imma bout to school you in the ways of my grey matter. I thrive in spontaneity. Not that I actively seek it out, mind you. My own forgetfulness, coupled with a can do attitude that gives me more trouble than it's worth, made sure that if I did not learn how to go with the flow at an early age, I would have been mired in a sea of uncertainty and doubt. I'm still mired in a sea of uncertainty and doubt, but at least I know the territory.
And so it was with not altogether too much worry that I walked in to school on the first day with no idea what classes I had or when they were, or in fact where the classes were at all anymore (unfinished construction certainly did not help with any of these). I managed to get a copy of my schedule and horror of horrors! An ELI class was not on it! This was a situation that had to be remedied with the greatest of speed. I dashed to the room of the Wiss to discover that no longer was it the room of the Wiss. After many trials and tribulations, I found my way to the new ELI room, received Wissner’s blessing, journeyed to the counselor’s office, changed my schedule...slew the dragon and got the girl. Pretty good da,y if I do say so myself.
This was the moment of truth. I had an ELI. Now I just had to figure out what to do with it. This would require deep thought and introspection. It was not to be taken lightly. I went home to research the furthest reaches of our brains. The darkest depths our emotions, and the highest peaks of our technology. I slaved over Wikipedia trying to tease out which topic would offer the the most interesting of papers, the most intriguing of theories, the most brilliant of conjectures, and the profoundest of realizations…aw! sweet! finding Nemo’s on Netflix! Not much got done that day.
Time passed. Teachers taught. Classes were released and bells rung. The time of prophecy drew near. The time at which I would have to chose my topic. Thoughts of transhumanism and quotes about our baser human instinct fought it out within my skull. By around third period I had slipped into what the more poetically minded of us might refer to as a zen like state. A state devoid of any specific thought or goal. Simply existing for the sake of it. Personally I refer to it a zoning out but to each his own. And so it was that when Ms.Wissner asked that most innocent of questions: “So, what are you thinking your topic is going to be?” “History of animation!”
Such was how I came to my topic. Animation, how it works, who does it, how they do it. It’s not particularly intriguing. It's not particularly known for its life changing epiphanies, profound it is seldom called, and pursuit of it is not lofty as such. But I love it anyway. It is a medium like no other. Picking a big topic is easy. Picking a topic such as human nature or emotions that we all share is a sure fire way to get some deep thoughts and ideas. But in my mind at least, this is the easy road. I would rather try to find meaning in something small, every day, something easy to overlook.
Perhaps it is not that some topics are more profound than others but that some are well worn paths leading to a predetermined idea of profoundness. It’s like big signs are pointing at them in flashing neon letters saying to the world, “Look! Right here! The abyss gazes also into you!”
Something being life changing, lofty, intriguing is a quality that we give it, not that it inherently possesses.
So far I have spent all nighters, had many trials and tribulations, and desperately combed sources. And yet, I find myself having a great time and telling people how much they would get out of an ELI. Funny how that works.
~Karl
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